The Green Green Grass Of Home

Yeah, your kids are never famous for taking fatherly advice. I was probably the same way. But once, about 12 years ago, Gainer did.

After he bought his first house, he asked me what kind of lawnmower he should buy. So here’s a kid who never cut a lawn in his life and couldn’t tell the difference between a lawnmower and a weed-whacker. Anyway, I told him to get a Snapper. A good, affordable mower. So he did. 

At the same time, we were working on a web series for the Log Cabin called “413 Wedding.” The series followed Gainer and his soon-to-be-wife, Jessica, through the whole to-do, from the planning to the reception. After Gainer bought the Snapper, he called me to help him to set up the rig. He couldn’t even figure out how to get it out of the box. So we shot a short, hand-held video for “413 Wedding” on setting up a mower as I rattled off some fatherly advice on the art of lawnmowin’.

Ya gotta watch this clip because you might be able to use some of the stuff I said to Gainer as a lawnmowin’ ace. I should have my own HGTV show. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8krpVkU5Rdw&t=5s

Another key piece of lawnmowin’ advice is to have a good lawnmowin’ beer. Lawnmowin’ beer comes in a can. A cold one that goes down easy on a hot summer day. Could be Heineken, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Miller High Life, ‘Gansett. Whatever you like. As Jimmy Breslin used to say, “A good drinkin’ beer.”

So last Saturday I got a call from Gainer to tell me he just mowed his lawn. And sure as shootin’, after 12 years with no tune-ups, no oil or spark plug changes, the Snapper starts on the first pull of the cord. Goddamn good advice from pops, pal. 

Keep your dukes up.