Claw Hold

Yep, a so-called environmental watchdog group is urging consumers to stop buying Maine lobsters—and to boycott businesses that sell ‘em. And national food retailers like Whole Foods, Blue Apron, Hello Fresh, and others have jumped on the bandwagon. Monterey Bay Aquarium’s Seafood Watch has put Maine lobster on a “red list” of seafood to avoid because it’s harvested in ways that are likely to harm wildlife or the environment.

All this hubbub is because North Atlantic right whales supposedly get tangled up in lobster trapping gear. The way I’ve always understood it, Paddy Wagon O’Connell, is that it’s the big cruise ships that are conking the whales, not the lobstering. Sounds to me like a fundraising tactic for this watchdog group who aren’t considering how they’re affecting the livelihoods of good, hard working people.

There are 5,000 lobster boats on the water in Maine and 80% of all lobsters sold nationwide come from them. Lobstering is a tough job, Billy Jack. And as someone who’s been going to Maine since I was knee-high to a grasshopper, I’ve always known lobstermen and women to be good environmental stewards. They serve the ocean, the ocean doesn’t serve them, Bandit Kelly. They understand the importance of conservation and protection better than anybody. Especially politicians and watchdog groups.

You ain’t gonna see me hauling net on a boat anytime soon. I’m an ad man, not a lobsterman. So this tagline will have to be my contribution to the cause: Lobstering. Let It Roll.

Keep your dukes up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1Nq82S7_0Q

If you know someone who’d like these ditties in their inbox every week, have ‘em shoot us an email at darbyo@darbyobrien.com and we’ll add ‘em to the list.