I Didn't Do It
After the Teddy Kennedy email a few weeks ago, I got a call from my old friend Jimmy Canavan who was the program lead for veteran support services at Bridgewater State University. When Jimmy’s wife Mary was president of Massachusetts College of Liberal Arts, the school brought Teddy in as a graduation speaker and presented him with an honorary degree.
“Big whoop,” I said. “I got an honorary degree once.”
“For what?” he said.
“I got a Doctorate in Mischief from Whatsamatta U.”
Hey, the key to success in the ad game is practicing mischief as a kid. The training ground is in the street, not the classroom.
Coupla things …
We used to pull what we called the “new tire trick” on highways. We’d find a ratbag old tire and wrap it with silver or gold foil, like how new tires were displayed at gas stations back then. So me and the boys would place the tire on the edge of the highway and attach a fishing line to it. So here comes Tommy Big Truck driving by as we’re hiding in a gulley. Tommy slams on his brakes and runs to grab the new tire. Then just as the long hauler goes to lift it, we yank it away laughing like hell. You wouldn’t believe the look on his face.
Another time we were having a tough time with our mailman, Mr. Martin. He was really nasty to us and our black lab Sgt. Pepper. The goddamn guy had booze nips in his mailbag and walked with a wobble. To get even with the mook, we set up a walkie-talkie on my parents’ roof and me and my brother Johnny had the other one inside the house. Again with the trusty old fishing line, we rigged up the mailbox so when Mailman Martin went to deposit the envelopes, a skeleton head popped up. Then through the walkie talkies, we said in a deep voice, “How do you do, Dr. Martin?” We scared the wing-ding out of him. He ran sideways down the sidewalk like a drunken jackrabbit. Then we let the dog out. We later heard he asked to have his route changed. Hey, as JFK always said, “Don’t get mad, get even.”
One good sign that mischief is alive and well is that Jackass Forever opened as the number-one movie in the country. There may be hope for us yet. Keep your dukes up.