Think Fast. Talk Faster.
Hey, with all the nutball stuff going on out there, sometimes ya gotta go off the ponderosa and throw a Mickey the Dunce fluffernutter story.
Unlike my honor student sister Betsy, I didn't do too good in school. But being Irish and growing up in Holyoke, I could tell a damn good story and sure as shootin’ talk my way out of a pickle.
Sometimes you have to employ the tactics of two legends: Eddie Haskell and Ferris Bueller.
Like the time I went to a wake at Barry Farrell’s in Holyoke. That night, two wakes were being held. I got in the wrong line, Gus. And it wasn’t until I saw the stranger in the casket that I realized my mistake. Holy Christ.
Luckily I spotted a card on a flower arrangement that said, “We’ll miss you, Jimmy.” When I got to the widow, she thanked me for coming and I came up with some malarkey about how old Jimmy and I went way back, always had a lot of laughs, what a stand-up guy he was, how we'll all miss him down at the plant. I kept up the yabba-dabba-doo as I made my way through the line smooth a pint of Guinness. By the end I felt like I knew the poor bloke.
RIP Jimmy. I hardly knew ya. Keep your dukes up.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-ZAL_1rcfQ
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